Statistic

5/24: Well, now I join the high percent of women that have thrown up from morning sickness. That was a fun 'treat' this morning. As the acid rose up my throat, I remember thinking 'Why in the world would anyone do this more than once?!'. I feel a lot better now, but I have a feeling that won't be the last time. Tyler just called from our room 'Uh oh.' He came out mid-puke and said 'So it begins'. He dumped my puke bowl and didn't fuss about it. What a sweetie. 

So to catch you up on the past week. I had spotting over this past weekend, but it was dark brown so I was told not to worry. Well, I still called my nurse anyway. So she wanted me to get my blood levels drawn on 5/19 and an ultrasound 5/21. My HCG levels on 5/19 were 98,000. They were 14,000 last Monday, so they are risely 'beautifully per my nurse. Tyler and I were still very worried something was wrong, but we knew we'd find out for sure at the ultrasound. 

5/21 we waited patiently as our ultrasound tech called us back 20 minutes late and started with a tummy ultrasound. She said happily, 'Oh look! There's the sack.' So we were pretty relieved. By the way. You have to have a full bladder to do those tummy ones, and then they push extra hard. It was all I could do not to pee myself. 

Then I had to use the restroom to prepare for the Transvaginal ultrasound (I'll let you look up that one). She took several pictures and measured our little minion. I am measuring at 7 weeks today (5/24), and my due date is January 10th. We actually got a surprise too! We heard a very strong heartbeat, first time! It was very sweet, and cute and wonderful!

So symptoms: only thrown up once!, dizziness, nausea (like motion sickness), and some breast soreness. I'm still having some food aversions (left overs, ginger, deli meat, coffee, spinach). I can't go near those things. No huge cravings besides potato skins last Sunday. I'm trying to drink smoothies most mornings so I can take my time drinking them. Bleh. 

Bumpy ride!

It's been two weeks since my last blog post, even though it hasn't been published yet!

Since then....

My OBGYN requested I get blood levels drawn 3 times in two weeks to sure that my blood levels were increasing normally (doubling every 48 hours). SOooo, 5/5 my HCG count was 700, 5/7 1800, 5/12 14,000. Wahoo, so all is good and well! However, there seems to be some great confusion on how far along I am. According to my LMP, I should now by 7 1/2-8 weeks along. HOWEVER, according to the ultrasounds I've had, I'm only 5 1/2-6 weeks. MAJOR SIGH. I know it may not seem like much, but I thought I was that much closer to getting out of the 1st trimester. I've been a nervous mess.

I wish women talked more about what to expect when you're 'expecting'. I've had spotting and blood three times in the past three weeks, and I've freaked out every time. Apparently, this can be normal. From my ultra sound three days ago, I possibly have a Subchronic hematoma (go ahead and look it up), so I need to be extra careful over the next 6 weeks.

Every time I have a cramp or weird feeling, I get nervous. 'Is that supposed to happen, What was that, Am I miscarrying?, AH!'. Thankfully, some of my mommy friends have been so helpful with advice and suggestions. Speaking of cramps. I continue to have them. Not as extreme as period cramps, but enough to make me worry. They aren't constant, but they happen at least 2-3 times a day, mostly at night. Apparently, my uterus is stretching so I get to feel it all happen! Wahoo.

During my latest ultrasound, they were able to detect a heartbeat. Our little muggles heart is already formed and beating at 103bpm. It's crazy. Right now our baby is only 2mm long, and resembles a dragon (Hungarian horntail? Sorry non-Harry Potter fans). Oh hey, I'm watching Harry Potter right now.

So how am I making it through all of this? God mainly. I am praying multiple times a day for strength and giving praise to Him. It is so unbelievably incredible watching this baby grow. How could people even question Him! Besides that, I am trying to surround myself with all positive strong people. And drinking lots of water.

Let's talk about pregnancy 'symptoms'. Yea, I got those. My boobs and nipples are SOOOOOORE. They've been like that for 3 weeks now. It comes and goes, sometimes throbbing, sometimes barely annoying. What else? Dizziness, lots of it. It started two weeks ago. I was so disoriented, I probably shouldn't have been driving... I've also had some major food aversions. Not to any particular food. Just mainly food in general. I am just NOT hungry. And then when I am, watch out! Last thing I'll say, constipation. Ouch!

Anywho, more to come.

May the FOURTH be with you

What an interesting past week. It's been 8 days since my initial post saying I was 'Pregnant', all off of a gut feeling after missing my period. Since then I've had 3 negative pregnancy tests and one negative blood test. Holy Moly was all of that stressful.

I still have not had my period. I did however, bleed a little bit last Tuesday (7 days late), after my blood test came back negative. So, after that, I assumed I was in the clear and finally let my mind set that this wasn't the time.

Well I talked to my friend who is the RN for The Pregnancy Service Center, where I volunteer every Friday. She said if I still haven't had a period, I should take a test this morning. So I did. And. I am pregnant. I took another one 6 hours later, just to make sure, and BOTH were positive (rather quickly I might add).

I quickly revealed this to my husband (with a card I made last week, just in case), and he all but bawled with excitement. I told my best friend who's been along with my on this journey, but that is all I'll tell for now. The plan is we can reveal to our immediate family this weekend on 'Mothers Day'. THEN eventually we can tell everyone when I get to 12 weeks (in about 6 weeks).

I'm going to be posting a WHOLE bunch of blogs back to back after we reveal!

I already bought a Harry Potter onesie off Etsy...Dear LORD please give me self control!

How did this happen...

A year has come and gone since my last entry. What a different place I was in then, emotionally-mentally. I've been medication free for over a year now, and that is a wonderful feeling. I continue to handle my anxiety (which is ever-present) by working out hard 4-5 days a week and doing things I enjoy. I'm down 20 lbs over the past year, and have maintained my current weight for the past 4 months (pretty awesome). I have not had a 'full-blown' panic attack over the past year. Maybe because I know what they feel like now, and I address it immediately. It may sound crazy, but I feel more susceptible to panic attacks on an empty stomach, so I try to snack often and it helps!!

Well that being said, it may all change now because...

I'm pregnant!

This has come as somewhat as a surprise, as we weren't going to really start trying until this fall. I got off my birth control last fall, and have been on prenatal vitamins since then. Prenatal vitamins by the way, gross. I've puked so many times from them, most people say it's due to the high Iron content. I guess it's been preparing me to practice upchucking my food, so yay.

By the time I've posted this, everyone else will know who is close to me. I felt such a strong need to start blogging this AMAZING gift from God, as I transition into motherhood. Let me tell ya, finding my password and email address was pretty difficult!

Anywho back to the pregnancy thing. Today, 4/26, and my period is five days late. It has not every fluctuated this much, plus we, uh, *ya know* close to my ovulation day. I didn't think anything of it, but when I noticed absence of a period along with some minor cramps I got a little NERVOUS. I took a test yesterday and it took FOREVER to work, and BAM negative... Hm. So basically, if I start my period here in the next couple days no one will see this post. At least, not the pregnancy part.

If I am pregnant, wowee, what a journey this will be. I spend all day everyday with children, so I know I'll handle that part okay. It's more the...not sleeping, gaining weight, labor, money thing that bothers me. Speaking of labor. Tyler and I decided awhile ago that we'd go with a home birth. All my friends/family think I'm crazy, but I know I can do this. What an empowering opportunity, and I refuse (as much as I can) to be drugged in any way. So, we'll see how that goes...

I haven't gotten much sleep over the past three days. It's all due to NOT KNOWING for sure if I am pregnant. For a planner, this part is difficult, hence the blog. I'll keep trying to write a post when I can, then when everyone knows, I'll post them all :)